Surrounded by negativity

 

Let’s talk about dealing with negative people that surround us on a daily basis. I’m not talking about the ones that occasionally vent their anger because they’ve had a rough day, I’m talking about the ones that are constantly bitching  and moaning about something or other. The ones that you know, that as soon as they open their mouths, nothing good is going to come out.

Have you ever really stopped and listened to the way these people speak? Friends, partners, work colleagues or even family members? Is their dialogue usually positive or negative? Does it uplift your mood or does it instead, put a damper on it?

Every day we see it. We hear it. And we usually ignore it. But, letting our fellow human-beings off the hook every time they burden us with their negativity, isn’t doing us any good at all. In fact, it’s quite harmful to our health - mental, emotional, as well as physical. It drains us without us even realising it until it’s too late. We carry around the extra weight of THEIR shit on our shoulders and we wonder why all of a sudden we feel weak, sluggish and heavy and sick all the time. Pretty soon we find ourselves sitting in the doctor’s office unable to explain to him why you feel like crap and then, without warning, you burst into uncontrollable tears. Finally, he feels sorry for you and proceeds to write out a script for Prozac or whatever drug it is that they’re prescribing for depression these days.

How often have we risen out of bed and started our day off in a reasonably good mood only to have that ‘good’ feeling, unfortunately, short-lived? All because someone has decided to shower us with their negative comments, bathe our mood with their murky philosophy and spoil our entire day with their gloomy opinions. We have unknowingly, and unintentionally opened wide the invisible gateway and allowed them to enter and transform, what could have been, a bright, sanguine atmosphere into a dark and despondent one. And who do we have to blame?

You got it! Yes. Ourselves.

We are the ones responsible for letting them get under our skin, for allowing them the opportunity to contaminate our precious day with their own pessimistic outlook on life and for standing there long enough to let them believe that we are interested or that we care. If we give them the false impression that it’s okay for them to continuously pour superfluous vocabulary into the air we breathe and contaminate it with their abhorrence, then hey, we only have ourselves to blame.

So what should we do?

Should we pull them up and explain that we don’t like to hear their negativity and hope that they get the hint? Or, do we ignore them and walk away?

Should we disagree and start an argument or a heated debate which could eventually lead to a fist fight or worse? Or do we simply smile, nod continuously and pretend to agree with them?

Should we stand there and ignore the feel of our insides bubbling away aggressively as we listen to their crap? Or do we gradually spend less and less time with these tedious souls until eventually the relationship becomes null and void?

Whichever you choose to do, or however you decide to deal with these personalities, just remember...you need, for your own sanity, to do something, ANYTHING. Don’t let their behaviour spoil your day but most of all be cautious because the company you keep determines the way others see you. Don’t allow negative people to lead you astray with their caustic beliefs. If all you hear over and over again are negatives, it soon becomes almost like a mantra. So if you can’t change their perception, make sure that you don’t give them the opportunity to change yours.

Ultimately, the choice is yours. Good luck.

Ciao’ for now...

M.C.